Why men have affairs?
Talk about a loaded issue that no one wants to chat about, this is it. Funny thing, affairs have been going on from old ages. Extramarital affairs can be loaded with problems, cause sorrow, and other harms. Also you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and honesty issue, funds, age difference, spiritual upbringing, remorse, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I should identify an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, married date.
Why do men have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are men seeking an affair. I am conserned mostly though it is just the human condition, the need for affection, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and respected. Here are a few reasons I have run across.
Physically we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasant and exciting, and sex makes us get away the world for a short period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Somebody are able to turn the longing on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another individual, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos culture has erected against extramarital affairs. For lots of individuals the yearnings will beat their fears and make them risk the wrath of not only their relatives, but society too. So why, what is the catalyst?
Sex Addicts, maybe some of us are. Sex is extremely pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not wound your spouse or anybody else? You would need to lessen the threat you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is advantageous to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the biggest cluster, colossal truly. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, except they feel comfortable in the way they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the children to think about. Your finances are so entwined. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to be jointly besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex performance, at least not with their othere half. An extra-marital affair occasionally solves the difficulty while keeping the marriage intact.
Neglect, sorrowfully this is a frequent groung I fear. One or the other, as a rule the man is sexually neglecting his spouse for a large humber of reasons. As a male I actually am grateful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them obtainable to us guys of romance, making them “hot wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just misplaced in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Maybe its romance that is missing, could be it is a shortage of love, maybe caring is disappeared, maybe it is the closeness, could be neglect. Maybe we have just grown separately, our common interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is opposed to of what you want. Maybe I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The first reason people give is, they look for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for economic gain, for payback and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.